Ascension Day
Today’s assigned readings:
Ezekiel 1:1-14, 24-28; Hebrews 2:5-18; Matthew 28:16-20
When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted.
Matthew 28:17
It’s a throwaway verse in the middle of a passage. It only comes up in the ECUSA Daily Office on this day, far as I know, but in the Orthodox Matins service it comes up one Sunday out of every three months (as they read through the Resurrection Appearences every Sunday in an eleven-week cycle). I noticed the verse for the first time 7 years ago when I was Episcopalian and it has continued to come up and *whap* me hard, every time.
See: I don’t like doubts. Not that I don’t have them, mind you. I just don’t like ‘em. So, I like to surround myself with people who come off as not having them. Mind you, I’ve no way of knowing if they mightn’t have doubts either. Just say all the right things, do all the right things and we’ll get along fine.
It’s my don’t ask/don’t tell policy.
Matthew and Jesus in this story seem to have a different point of view. But I’d like to insert some verses that would certainly be in the text if I wrote this story:
28:16
Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain to which Jesus had directed them.28:17
When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted.
28:18
And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me.
28:18+1
So you doubters get out of here.
28:18+2
Thomas said, what about those of us that doubted you but are ok now?
28:18+3
Jesus said, You can stay for now, but don’t let it happen again.
28:18+5
James said, Wait, Bro. What about those of us who are ok so far, but this whole deity thing is getting a little troublesome. We’re just good Jews.
28:18+6
He said, Sorry, Cuz: yer outtahere like a baseball hit by Bonds on ‘Roids.
28:18+7
James said, Lord?
28:18+8
See? I’m omniscient and you doubt me. Out. What’s that leave now?
28:18+9
John said, Six, Lord, no… wait, five: Thaddeus just walked out too.
28:18+10
Jesus said, Right then.
28:19
Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit
.
And a rewrite of 28:20
Hey, dudes: I’m with you always, unless you doubt, you know.
It’s interesting that the doubters show up *among the 11*. These folks have been with Jesus since the beginning. They’ve been through the crucifixion. They’re standing in front of the Resurrected Christ. But they’ve got doubts: even now. Doesn’t matter: Go and baptise. And, lo, I’m with you - even you doubting ones.
The thing is, Matthew doesn’t seem to posit doubting as opposite to worship. And Jesus doesn’t seem to posit doubting as opposite to anything. In the real story (as opposed to my pious rewrite) he doesn’t segregate the doubters from the rest. And he commissions them ALL: doubters and the others alike.
Doubting Evangelists? How revolutionary is that? In the end, Jesus blesses and ordains even the doubters, unsegregated from the others.
I’ve been in a couple of places where there were doubters around: either openly or covertly. But I’ve only been in one place where they were welcomed with open arms - almost as if by Jesus himself - as full participants in the Christian community.
What strikes me hard from my own experience is that I was most hateful when I needed to deny my own doubts. I say this about theology - but I’ll add sexuality too. Heck, I’ll add anything. I begin to wonder if the definition of “True Believer” (with all the really bad things that implies) isn’t really, “One who is in such deep denial about his doubts that he’ll hurt you if you confront him.”
I get there from my work in Addiction: one possible reason a person drinks or drugs or engages in any other addictive behaviour is because it helps her override doubts about her own worth, her own power and position. As a result of these perceived weaknesses, addictions help her not to overcome the weaknesses, but rather to deny them to herself, to forget them. Later she will enter denial about the addiction too - I don’t doubt, and I don’t eat all day to cover that doubt.
Is it possible for orthodoxy, per se, - politics, sex, philosophy, religion, whatever - to be an addiction? One that helps us cover up our own doubts and our fears about the doubts of others?
Eh?
On today’s feast, personally, I’m more confused by modern objections to the Ascension than I am to ancient depictions of it. I’m alright with God dealing with first century folks in ways they understood within their culture. We say this about a lot of things that we do today that Jesus didn’t. Why did Jesus seemingly pick only male clergy? Easy. His culture. I think the same thing applies here: Assume all the things the Church teaches about Jesus are true. He’s fully God and perfect man, omniscent. Does Jesus here have the time to explain that the universe is not a three-level affair, Hell, Middle Earth and Overheaven? Assuming he does, in fact, have the time to pass on that knowledge and these Jewish fishermen can grasp it. Should the Gospel then be tied to taking this new science to the world? Far easier to float up and vanish than to have to give a lesson about ten dimensions and transpersonal reality no?
Jesus welcomes us, too: The thing about the Ascension is not its quasi-mythical space travel elements but rather something very important.
O Christ, Giver of life, lover of humankind, you went up to the Father and exalted our race in your ineffable compassion.
The ranks of Angels, as they saw your mortal nature going up with you, O Saviour, were astounded and without ceasing sang your praise.
The choirs of Angels were amazed, O Christ, as they saw you being taken up with your body, and they sang the praise of your holy Ascension.
Human nature, which had fallen by corruption, you raised up, O Christ, and by your ascension you exalted and glorified us with yourself.
It’s that last one. Human nature is united with divinity and our very mortal human flesh enters immortal eternity. The Ascension is the showing forth of God’s welcoming of humanity back into paradise: Even us doubters.